


Broken

by Nikky_the_writer



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-06
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-12 09:36:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16870540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nikky_the_writer/pseuds/Nikky_the_writer
Summary: Reader has a difficult past which only a few people know





	Broken

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on my Tumblr: @nikky-the-writter

  **Bucky’s POV**

  _Was she afraid of me?_

We were all sitting in the living room watching some new movie. I think it was something called Star wars, apparently there is more than one movie. Everyone from the team was here, even she. (Y/N) was with the Avengers longer than me. Steve told me that she joined a few months before Ultron. When I came to the tower for the first time I was surprised to see Tony, he put the past behind him, at least he said that. First, he introduced me to Natasha, Clint and Bruce and later I met Vision, Wanda and her brother Pietro, Sam, James, Scott, Peter and (Y/N). When I met her I thought that I scared her because she run away after I shook her arm. Steve told me that it wasn’t me, at first it was hard to believe, but after, I realized what he meant. She haven’t really spoken to anyone, she would just say a few words, nothing more. I never saw her smile. She was close to Scott, they would never talk when we all were there, but Wanda told me that they were best friends.

___________________________________________________________

We were watching Tv and there she was sitting on the floor, nobody was close to her. She was covered with blanket playing with its edges, while watching. I was seated on the couch between Steve and Scott. I had to know what was her story.

˝What is going on with her? ˝I whispered to Scott so that only he could hear.

˝What do you mean? (Y/N) is fine. ˝ Scott was getting angry and I couldn’t figure out a way

˝I mean she is quite and she is not letting anyone come close to her˝

˝Bucky, she is like that, she is not letting anyone close that is just the way that she is, there is nothing wrong with her˝ Scotts voice softened a little, like he was sorry for me.

˝You are close to her˝

˝Yeah, I am the only one who knew her before, so we stayed close, there is nothing that you could do Bucky. You are not the only guy who likes her, I have dealt with them before. ˝

She had that look on her face every time when I would see him, the same look that I was carrying for years.

˝Before what Scott? ˝ Scott was getting up.

˝It is not my story to tell and I am sure you will never hear it from her, so please just back off˝

Scott was ready to leave, then he turned around to (Y/N).

˝ (Y/N), pizza night? ˝ She just looked up to Scott, getting up I could see a little spark in her eyes.

_________________________________________________________

 ˝Hey Steve! ˝ It was a long night. The guys decided to watch the three parts of that movie and now I am so tired, but is morning. I can’t really sleep during the day.

˝What’s going on? ˝ Steve was eating sandwiches, worried about me.

˝Can we talk about something? ˝ Steve just gestured to the empty chair across him.

˝Bucky I am sure you mean about someone and not something? ˝

˝I wanted to talk about (Y/N) ˝

˝Again, I already told you I can’t tell, she never told me what happened to her, but I read something in her file. Please just drop it, you are not going to like what you will heard˝ Steve walked to the kitchen leaving the table in the dishwasher.

˝Please just tell me? ˝

˝Just because you like her? That is classified information. ˝ I was surprised with his question. Was it so obvious?

˝ Not just because I like her because I’m your friend! ˝It wasn’t nice of me to asking him that, but I knew that she will never tell me. I had to know.

˝She is my friend too, it is not right˝

˝Please Steve I just… ˝

˝Fine˝ I couldn’t believe that he will tell me, I really wanted to know, but I never thought that he will tell me.

˝Before I tell you, I want you to know that this is not right and  I know only information from a file, nothing more. ˝

˝I understand˝ I said before hearing every word that Steve was saying.

_________________________________________________________________________________

**Reader’s POV**

It was a long night and I couldn’t sleep, my stomach hurt from pizza. I ate too many slices, how will I train with Steve in a few hours? I really ate too much.

˝I hate you Scott˝ I murmured in my pillow. 

My alarm started beeping, it was already time to get up. After taking a long, cold shower I went to the kitchen where I could hear voices. Immediately recognizing them. While, entering the room, I heard Steve saying Bucky something about Iceland, which was strange because we never had a mission there.

_Was he telling him about me? He wouldn’t do it, would he?  
_

Steve stopped talking when he saw me and Bucky turned around to see why was his friend staring at the door. I kept on walking, looking around, trying not to think about them.

˝ Morning (Y/N) ˝ Steve said, expecting me to say the same, I just waved with my hand and head to the shelf to get my cereals and milk from the fridge. I ate on the couch, not wanting to sit next to Steve or Bucky. Lately I would catch Bucky staring at me and it made me feel uncomfortable after everything that happened to me.

_________________________________________________________

My parents were S.H.I.E.L.D. agents, they were high-level agents. It was their routine to train with me after breakfast and to teach me new languages. By the age of fifteen, I already knew everything that they knew. They didn’t want me to join the S.H.I.E.L.D. and that’s  why we were living in a nice house in quiet neighbourhood. It was great living there, but it didn’t feel right. When they would be on the mission, Scott would stay with me, he was always there, like an older brother. He was my father’s friend and my father trusted him. Everything was great until the day when S.H.I.E.L.D. sends me the letter that my parents were killed on the mission. That was all I got just a letter nothing more.

A few weeks later Scott was arrested. I visited him every day, he was the only person that I had left.

A month after I turned nineteen I was kidnapped. I didn’t know who were they, what they wanted, nothing. 

_________________________________________________________

They locked me away. Torturing me every day for information, but they couldn’t break me. I didn’t care for information that I knew, but my parents told me that information, I couldn’t betray them. For several years they were beating me, cutting and burning my skin, drowning me in cold water, and I still didn’t say anything, they did brake me as a person,but I was getting more resistant and more patient every day, losing the ability to feel the pain. I had a plan how to escape, but there was nothing for me left outside, only Scott and he was in prison. I was saved by the same people who abandoned me, by S.H.I.E.L.D.. The whole time I thought that I was still in America, but I wasn’t, I was in Reykjavík. I was approached by Nick Fury, who was a family friend. He wanted me to join him, telling me that there is nobody who would he rather have by his side. I agreed, but the scars were still there, reminding me that I was abandoned, I knew they didn’t come to Iceland to save me, they came to kill me so that I wouldn’t revealed their secrets. Not long after I joined the Avengers, I didn’t want to, but everything become better when Scott was asked to join. I become really significant to the Avengers, being the best and fastest fighter, never falling to my knees, but I was never, really the part of them. I kept to myself only talking with Scott and Steve, because he was the leader. I knew everything about their pasts, but nobody was broken like I was, but now I am starting to think that Bucky is the only one who would understand what happened to me. I never talked to anyone about it, only Scott knew everything. There wasn’t much in S.H.I.E.L.D. files, only basic information and pictures of my scarred body.

_________________________________________________________

˝Hey (Y/N) ˝ Wanda came to the couch eating ice-cream, not long after Scott sat next to me.

˝What’s going on? ˝ Scott asked worried.

˝Nothing, I was just… ˝

Wanda interrupted me by asking ˝Are you coming to the beach? Whole team agreed on going today. ˝

˝No, we will stay inside, but have fun˝ Scott answered for both of us, not asking me.

˝No, Scott will go, he have to. ˝ Why would he miss out something like that for me?

Wanda was smiling ˝But why don’t you come too? ˝ I could only lie to her, I didn’t want to tell her the truth, I didn’t want anyone to pity me. ˝Sorry, but I already have something to do today˝

˝I hope you come next time, I will go get ready˝, she said while walking out of the room, followed by Steve and Bucky.

˝I can stay˝ Scott said while eating.

˝You don’t have to Scott I’m fine on my own. ˝

˝But I want you to know that you are not alone˝, suddenly he hugged me and whispered in my ear. ˝You should give them a chance˝, I moved away from him, standing up ˝Maybe, one day I will, now promise me you will go. ˝

_________________________________________________________

All of them left, I stayed behind in quite tower. I took all the snacks that I could find taking them into the living room, because there was the biggest plasma screen. I turned off all the light and pulled the curtains across the windows. The screen lit up the whole room, it was difficult to decide what to watch. I randomly took one of the DVDs from the pile. The movie was called Disturbia, I never heard of it. An hour into the movie I could feel the cold breeze, it was strange, but not scary. I ignored it, it could be just Friday. Suddenly I heard footsteps, it was too early for them to come back. Quickly getting up I stand behind the doors, they opened and somebody walked in, not recognizing the person. I came behind the man approaching closely to him, after few punches and tackling him to the ground, a metal arm grabbed my wrist, ˝ (Y/N), it’s me, Bucky. ˝, getting up I turned on the lights and exhaled.

˝Why are you here? ˝

˝I didn’t want to leave you alone˝, he said with a soft voice. I sat back on the couch and he sat beside me.

˝We are not so different (Y/N), I think that I know why you didn’t want to go on the beach today˝.

After what he said, I was sure that Steve told him, obviously you can’t trust anyone.

˝I am not self-conscious, Bucky, just because you have problem with your arm, doesn’t mean that I have the same problem with my scars.˝, he lowered his head.

˝So, you heard us talking? I’m sorry it wasn’t Steve’s fault, I just really want to know you. ˝

˝Then you should have asked˝, there was contempt in my voice, he could have come to me, he is only one who would understand.

˝I’m sorry˝, he slowly stand up.

˝You shouldn’t hate it˝

˝What do you mean (Y/N)? ˝, he asked, looking at me, while the movie was still playing in the background.

˝Your arm, don’t hate it, don’t even hate people who turned you to the person who you are now. Maybe it sounds silly, but you should be grateful for every struggle in your life, just like I am. It made me stronger. ˝

˝Why don’t you tell others the truth? ˝

˝Because of the same reason that you are hiding your arm, you think that they will see a monster if they see your arm, if they see my backs full of scars they would pity me, I don’t want to be known as a poor girl with scars. ˝

He sat back taking my hand in his, I moved away a little because of the sudden contact.

˝I won’t hurt you˝, he murmured

˝I know˝, I said quitely.

˝I know your secret and I would never think of you as a poor girl with scars, you are the most perfect human being that I have ever met˝

˝More perfect than Steve Rogers? ˝, I smiled

˝More perfect than Steve˝, he was giggling. I took that chance to gently squeeze his metal arm. The feeling was good, different, but it felt right. 

 

Bucky and I, we were just two broken souls who were trying to find our way back in the world, among the people who will never know how does it feel to be broken, left in the dark, having no hope that you will ever see the light.

 

 

 


End file.
